Relationships...

Some one somewhere said relation ship is one kind of a ship which sails across the ocean of life. I used to wonder how can you manage more than one such ship in the life. Whoever said that may or may not have thought about that. When we try to keep the life calm we forget that we have forgot to sail some relationships across. One friend of mine reminded me when we try to sail many relationships be it be lovers or friends whom we give emotional support, at some point of time we would feel we cant take control of ourself. Probably thats true. As the blog title says I am a dreamer and imagine life to be a dream wherein I make all those who need me happy. But however its not as realistic as i thought.

I have met so many people in my life, I have been in love couple of times, I have a handful of really good friends, i think i have enjoyed the bitter sweet moments in relationships. I have realized some things - reinvented - the worst war fought in this world happens inside human heart/mind whatever you call it. And the worst pain i would say is being lonely, being ignored, being avoided, living without hope and love and feeling helpless in front of life. Every one in this world would do almost everything to avoid this pain, they would be selfish, they would kill people, they hurt people thinking that they can get back some hope. But our little mind is like a small small chick, it would be always in hunger for love. Another friend of mine recently told me that friends are part of life but not life. But is there anything in this world which is complete without its parts.

Ok forget all that… today my father was asking me to create a profile in one of the matrimony sites. Yes if it has to be done some day then there is no point in keeping it for long time. But I could fill up only till the last page where it asked me about my self and the expectations. yes i have pressed Command+W. Weird i don't think i can ever do this, its so overwhelming. I feel so awkward to put myself on display like a shirt on a mannequin, i wish i could find my partner without have to undergo this thing. I don't think some one can understand me seeing my picture and my expectations. Its bull shit, but there is nothing else can be done. This part of my life has to come from one website i think. Let me see when my profile shows up there! First response will be special. :) lol