Fools Die...

I have taken the title of this blog from that of the book 'Fools Die' by Puzo. It was a different book compared to his other popular books. This book is his own personal favorite, when you read it, you will see Puzo in a different dimension, as a person who had lot more to say. The book is about the life of Merlin, who try to see magic in life.

When I read the book though I realized what Puzo was trying to tell, some recent events in life around me has made me realize that certain things can't be fixed. Acceptance of things are very difficult, it's still difficult to me. I used to deal with those things with philosophy and spirituality. Most of the times we try to see life with an attitude, when it throw shit at you; but I feel helpless at sometimes and I see life with a measured respectful smile, because thats what it deserves. I think life has to be dealt with the cleverness of a poker player, you should prove yourself to be cleverer for the tricks life is trying to play with you by being prepared and never to be caught off guard. Keep your eyes open, let your wisdom guide you, and judge and learn from every thing around you.

Leave about the fools and how dramatic life can be. Lets talk philosophy. Don't you agree 'Refusal to think is the worst sin'.So I have become a fan of 'Objectivism' of Ayn Rand. She says 'My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute.' I agree to that completely. I sound selfish don't I, yes thats the whole point. Read along in her own words quoted from here

1. Reality exists as an objective absolute—facts are facts, independent of man’s feelings, wishes, hopes or fears.
2. Reason (the faculty which identifies and integrates the material provided by man’s senses) is man’s only means of perceiving reality, his only source of knowledge, his only guide to action, and his basic means of survival.
3. Man—every man—is an end in himself, not the means to the ends of others. He must exist for his own sake, neither sacrificing himself to others nor sacrificing others to himself. The pursuit of his own rational self-interest and of his own happiness is the highest moral purpose of his life.
4. The ideal political-economic system is laissez-faire capitalism. It is a system where men deal with one another, not as victims and executioners, nor as masters and slaves, but as traders, by free, voluntary exchange to mutual benefit. It is a system where no man may obtain any values from others by resorting to physical force, and no man may initiate the use of physical force against others. The government acts only as a policeman that protects man’s rights; it uses physical force only in retaliation and only against those who initiate its use, such as criminals or foreign invaders. In a system of full capitalism, there should be (but, historically, has not yet been) a complete separation of state and economics, in the same way and for the same reasons as the separation of state and church.

Be reasonable and accountable for everything. And you will be able to find happiness just for being that way. I hope. I want to be called 'A reasonable honest man' when I die. 

Unreasonableness..

Its been quite a while since I have blogged. I was carried away by work and some other things. Then I got a break this weekend in the shape of a long weekend. we had planned to go to Bournemouth beach and some other places around in Dorset. It was a nice experience to plan and execute a trip with 17 people with 17 opinions. I can not completely say I enjoyed executing it, but it was a different experience. But it was sad to realize that there are still people who are not willing to do some compromises for a group cause. When the group is so big we tend to loose a lot of time in waiting for others to be ready. Here also same thing happened many times, be it for getting up, or going out, or having food, people gets scattered all around and they never come back. I realised that respect for time is the most abused thing in these days. Every day we had lost at the least 4-5 hours of good time because of this I think. I was comparing this trip with the Isle of Wight and Wales trip which I planned and executed. They went on excellent because it was smaller group with 4-5 people and they were ready to stick to the plans. 

Most of the time I found myself alone for the some reason. Its not because they didn't like me (I guess) some people still thanked me for making the trip wonderful. But some didn't. Even some people I wished say thanks didn't do that. I am not a saint (yet) not to expect anything. I decided to take that responsibility because I kind of realised no one would do that and to make it good for every one including me, I need to do something. I would still do it but why I want to point this is because gratitude is one thing which is disappearing so fast from the world around me. People think a lot about or don't think at all about saying a thanks or a sorry. Some used to say they are the words which are abused so much. But now they are not used at all to be abused of. Love is always over rated and gratitude was always underrated. I kind of wish the people who are not punctual or make other people suffer say a sorry even if its without meaning sorry, it would make the person who waited or suffered gain back little self respect. It amuses me to realize how selfish people have become. Last week I asked my friend to say sorry to me and tried to explain even to a friend it matters a lot. I think I lost a friend because of that. Its such a pity that relations comes down to dust over ego. Some may argue that even I was egotist by asking for sorry. I would say I was trying to get back my hurt self respect, if I couldn't explain that to my friend then how could the world. It was for a silly thing anyway. Without respect for me or care for my self respect how can some one be my friend. The difference between ego and self respect in my opinion is that the later one is reasonable. Unreasonable people are either dumb or ignorant; or vice versa.. You can't just talk to them. Hopefully there is a reason why they are like that. but as Karl Marx said “Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form.”

My humble request to all the readers is that; be reasonable for every action. Say thanks and sorry abundantly. It can change the world around you amazingly. "What goes around come around". 

"Reasonable people adapt themselves to the world. Unreasonable people attempt to adapt the world to themselves. All progress, therefore, depends on unreasonable people.” - George Bernard Shaw

Paranoia...

I am really stressed… for different reasons. And I am not sure how long I can stand this before I turn stone cold again like sometime back. It was not long ago I have become very selfish person and never bothered about any one, may be an year and a half before. Thats when I realized I am just being exploited for being nice and considerate, I was in the middle of mean people. Luckily I have escaped from there to London where i have started thinking again and put God back into where he belonged and I became a sensitive person again.

There is a pressure to get married, its not actually a pressure from others. The pressure is within myself. I am really desperate for a companion and thats one side and on the other hand finding one is a gamble. Being a fare and reasonable person who doesn't like to judge people; I don't like to reject anyone or getting rejected by anyone. Unfortunately both happened during and after the vacation period. This was a blow to my ego. All the my insecurities were hidden behind a wall of hypocrisy which I built to protect myself from excessive humility, and that wall was shattered when my honesty was not taken at face value. I wish I could meet some one (again?) and let that person understand me and marry me instead of this brutal game. I some how feel pity for myself and for all the gals (parents) looking for a groom. I really wish we could adopt the western culture here. At least the concept of blind dating. Its more respectable than what I am going through.

Another pressure is to choose between two rights. Possessive friends can be a trouble and they don't trust you and at the same time they don't want to let you go. They just get hurt and get angry for more or less everything. I pity possessive people because they are very insecure people. Was I possessive? I never know, because whomever I have expected from in this life has given me what I expected. I have got over with possessiveness because my expectation from others have just came down to a mere smile or an ear for sometime. Seriously I have not possessed any one for a long time now. I never had to be exact. A matured relation never would have possessiveness to trouble it. It just spoils the moments which would have brought smiles.

I love reading dramatic novels which involves great family stories over generations, like the book I am reading right now Ken Follett's A Dangerous Fortune. These novels gives me a perspective which makes me thoughtful. How difficult it is to have a close knitted family? By a family I mean not just those who live under a roof. I find it very difficult to build a team of 5 people to work in harmony. But still they have a common goal which is a good product delivery and a salary which they get paid for delivering a product. At least that goal makes them achieve something as a team. But in a family mostly people lack a common goal. I wonder why it is like that. I really struggle sometimes to make my cousins understand how much i value them. Some do understand that without saying and some don't care at all. Its very difficult to break the shell and make them believe that I am also a well wisher. I just wish at least in a family every one looked up to every one for everything and trusted and leaned on shoulders of each other. People tend to be more and more protective of themselves and I wonder why and from what! People fear to say things about themselves, I am alarmingly candid and I like people to see through me. I worry either about why I am like this or why others are not like me

These are making me paranoid. 

"When there's an elephant in the room introduce him." — Randy Pausch